Moving on from a Traumatic Childhood

Childhood trauma, aka abuse, of any kind, leaves its victims with many symptoms that interfere with their daily lives. However, these disruptive behaviors are treatable, and one can overcome a traumatic childhood.


This piece will discuss overcoming childhood trauma and moving on.


Getting Stuck



It is not uncommon for adults who experienced childhood abuse to get stuck in their victimhood. Those afflicted seem to find themselves living in their trauma and unable to move on.


Healing from childhood trauma takes time and many who were abused feel when they enter therapy that their therapist should have all the answers and get discouraged when they realize that they will not heal overnight.


Getting unstuck requires insight into behaviors that are holding the survivor back and limiting their ability to move on. Too often, survivors find themselves stuck and feel powerless to change their situation.


Some survivors identify so much with victimhood that it becomes their identity. Thus, they are unwilling to give up their internal feelings of victimhood.


Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Childhood Trauma




Complex post-traumatic stress disorder is caused, in large part, by adverse childhood experiences. CPTSD is a chronic condition with many adverse symptoms that is often hard to treat but people can move on and live well even though the conditions still exist.


The symptoms of CPTSD affect survivors in their cognitive, emotional, and physical abilities.


  • Reliving the trauma through flashbacks and nightmares
  • Avoiding situations that remind them of the trauma
  • Dizziness or nausea when remembering the trauma
  • Hyperarousal
  • The belief that the world is a dangerous place
  • A loss of trust in the self or others
  • Difficulty sleeping
  • A negative self-view
  • Emotional regulation difficulties
  • Problems with relationships
  • Thoughts or actions of suicide
  • Fixating on the abuser or seeking revenge
  • Losing memories of trauma or reliving them
  • Difficulty regulating emotions that often manifest as rage
  • Depression
  • Sudden mood swings
  • Feeling detached from oneself
  • Feeling different from others
  • Feeling ashamed
  • Feeling guilty
  • Difficulty maintaining relationships
  • Seeking our or becoming a rescuer
  • Feeling afraid for no obvious reason
  • Difficulty sleeping
  • Startling easily by loud noises
  • A negative self-view
  • Emotional regulation difficulties
  • Problems with relationships
  • Thoughts or actions of suicide


The above list of symptoms is daunting to anyone who is trying to escape the cycle and move on from trauma and victimhood.


Dissociative Identity Disorder and Moving On



Dissociative identity disorder (DID) comes with many life-altering problems and is also caused by childhood trauma. Despite what some may tell you, DID cannot form after the age of 10 and is always traumagenic.


Survivors of extreme childhood trauma have saved their own sanity and life by forming DID by forming alters who made taking the abuse perpetrated against their minds and bodies. Without the alters, these survivors couldn’t have borne the abuse they did and been able to grow to adulthood.


While DID is a gift, it is also a trouble when the child reaches adulthood. The disruptive symptoms of DID often drag people down and keep them from becoming who they were meant to be.


On top of the symptoms of CPTSD survivors who have formed dissociative identity disorder also have symptoms such as those mentioned in the DSM-5 TR such as:


  • Amnesia for certain periods such as events, people, and sometimes personal information
  • Feeling detached from themselves and their emotions
  • Perceiving people and things as distorted and unreal
  • A confused sense of identity
  • Significant problems with relationships, work, or other areas in their lives
  • Inability to cope well with emotional stress
  • Co-occurring diagnoses such as depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts or actions


Healing enough to move on and leave the trauma of the past in the past is very hard when dealing with all the symptoms that accompany DID.


Although dissociative identity disorder and complex post-traumatic stress disorder are lifelong afflictions, that does not mean that life cannot get better. You can move on from the trauma and chaos of the symptoms of DID.


Yes, you can.


Overcoming Childhood Trauma and Moving On



You cannot change history; this is an unalterable fact.


What you can do is starting today, make a pact within yourself with all your alters that you will begin thinking of yourself as a survivor rather than a victim. The designation may seem trivial, but it is not. A victim has no means of escape and cannot move on. A survivor is willing to do whatever it takes to move on.


Yes, what happened to you was unfair and horrendous, but why should you live in the pain and sorrow of your childhood for the rest of your life? Do you want to let the bastards who hurt you win? You are a warrior and have always found your way through the pain. Don’t stop now.


Beyond victimhood, there is life, even though you will always have dissociative identity disorder. You can learn to cooperate as a system and move in the same direction.


There is no reason to remain miserable and in pain. Working with a therapist, you can learn to listen to yourself and trust your judgments.


I know what it feels like to move on.


I feel relief from the worst of my symptoms. I feel a sense of having a future although I am getting older. Life isn’t easy or fair, but I’ve learned to accept that.


You can move on, too.


Ending Our Time Together


Moving on is harder than it sounds. Accepting that your past has negatively altered your present brings grief and many tears, but it is the only way to pull together as a unit and move in the same direction.


When I first was diagnosed with DID, I was overwhelmed with grief and my life was lived in chaos. I felt the unfairness of me having to pay for what others did to me and remained a victim for many years until I was forced to enter a psychiatric ward to live.


After seven years of living in an institution, one day I woke up and decided I didn’t want to be a victim any longer. Instead, I wanted to go back to college and finish my associate degree and help others not fall into the trap I did.


Writing a blog and doing other projects has enabled me to reach thousands of people all over the world and others to avoid the mistakes I have made along my healing path.


If I can be at peace like I am today, you can too. Believe in yourself.


“The only person who can pull me down is myself, and I’m not going to let myself pull me down anymore.” ― C. JoyBell C.


“Live the Life of Your Dreams
When you start living the life of your dreams, there will always be obstacles, doubters, mistakes, and setbacks along the way. But with hard work, perseverance, and self-belief there is no limit to what you can achieve.” ― Roy T. Bennett




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